Isn’t it funny how people look at other couples on social media and assume they have the perfect lives?
I’ve had it plenty of times where people have looked at pictures or Snap Chats of me and Sean and have commented on how cute, happy and perfect are. People have said they wish they had what we have…
I don’t see us as being anything special. Just like any other couple, we argue. We infuriate each other and have down days but that doesn’t mean we love each other any less, we just have to know how to get back to our little love bubble. What a lot of people forget is that you only see what people want you to see on social media. You don’t see all the hard work that goes into getting that imperfectly perfect relationship that works for you so I thought I’d give a few hints and tips on what seems to work for us.
- Learn to give each other space
Now, me and Sean are a bit of an odd couple. I genuinely can’t remember the last time I went a day without seeing him. Some may say we’re clingy but each to their own. We learned very quickly that we like being around each other so if we argue, one of us will remove them self from the situation till it all dies down then we’ll decide whether we need more space or if we’re going to make up and carry on as normal.
- Accept you’ll go through your ups and downs but always look forward
Me and Sean went months without ever really disagreeing. There was a time when I could have never imagined us arguing but long behold, we now argue all the time. The arguments may only be debates sometimes but at first it freaked us out. Don’t get me wrong, things aren’t perfect but when you both know what you want and agree on wanting the same future, arguments/disagreements only last so long. If we argue, I may be mad at the time but nothing changes in terms of what I want so I guess for me, its easier to get over the arguments as I know I’m not going anywhere.
- Never go to bed without resolving an issue
One thing I love about Sean is the fact that very early on we both agreed never to go to bed annoyed with each other and he’s stuck to his word. Life is too short and we’re as soppy as each other but that doesn’t stop me from being stubborn. If someone annoys me, I can happily go a week without talking to them. Sean balances things out in the sense that normally, where I’d have waited to talk things through, he’ll force me to talk before we go to bed so that when I wake up. if anything is still annoying me, we’ll have another chat the next day and then we move on.
- Don’t dwell on past arguments
This one kind of leads on from the previous point. We never have the same argument twice. Have you ever noticed how when you get mad, it reminds you of the last time you felt that mad and you start bringing up petty things from ages ago? Well for us, if we are really resolving an issue then we know it’s done and dusted otherwise we will talk about it till its not an issue anymore. When you start arguing over past things, you never move on.
- Lear how to communicate
This one is probably the most important because if you can’t really communicate with each other then its very hard to follow steps 1-4! Me and Sean are very different, he’s hot headed and a typical man who doesn’t really listen and I like giving the silent treatment when I’m mad. I was reading a blog a month or so ago where someone was giving advice on really listening to your other half. So the way it works, basically, if you say a sentence, the other person will reply with “I heard” and then repeat what they think they heard. You wouldn’t believe how much you can misunderstand each other and sometimes that leads to arguments. Even if we’re just messing around we’ve carried on with that little exercise just because we both know who we are as people and as much as we want the same thing, we need to communicate effectively so that even when we go through our rough patches, we know how to speak to each other without making things worse.
You’ll never see a picture of me being mardy with Sean or him storming out when I’ve told him one too many times he’s a d**k. Hopefully this shows the other side!
Do you find you have any interesting ways that help you and your partner stay Instagram perfect in real life?